Good Night, Dr D
by beeftony
Summary: Drakken has trouble getting to sleep, and it's up to Shego to help him.


Dr. Drakken stretched his arms and groaned before plopping onto his bed. After a hard day of villainy, it was rewarding to have a warm place to call his own, with his teddy bear clutched tight in his arms and a glass of warm milk on the nightstand. He settled under the covers and curled into a comfortable position and waited for sleep to claim him.

_Chirp_

The mad scientist's eyes snapped open at the sound. "Someone there?"

Another series of chirps was the only reply.

"Hello? Shego, is that you?"

Silence. Then more chirping.

Drakken scowled. Now he knew what this was.

"Knock it off! Some of us are trying to sleep!" he thundered, to no avail. If anything, the chirping grew in intensity.

Gritting his teeth, Drakken wrapped his pillow around his ears in an attempt to drown out the noise. He succeeded in muffling it a bit, but it still wasn't enough. He decided to jam his fingers into his ears directly, and while that seemed to work, he knew that he was never going to get to sleep unless he was in a comfortable position.

'_This is silly_,' he thought. '_What kind of world conqueror would I be if I let myself be defeated by some lousy crickets_?' He pondered that for a moment, then a wicked grin slid over his face.

The crickets would have to go. Still grinning, he stood up from his bed, the clockwork already turning in his head as his mind worked on a glorious solution to this problem.

* * *

Shego shuffled into the lair's kitchen, barely cognizant of anything other than her desire for a glass of water. She really should have had the foresight to take care of that before she'd gone to bed, but she'd spent most of the day overseeing a series of thefts for whatever Drakken's latest scheme was. Kimmie had gotten involved at one point, and though she had sent the teenager packing and gotten away with whatever science equipment Drakken wanted, the encounter had still taken a lot out of her. And made her thirsty.

'_That's what I get for stealing from the U.S. Military. What is it with them and desert bases, anyway_?' she wondered idly as she went through the motions of pouring herself a tall glass of clear liquid. She much preferred tropical beaches—at least with them there was always the option of cooling off in the waves.

Raising the glass to her pitch-dark lips, she swallowed it in several long gulps, savoring it with a relish usually reserved for drinks with a much higher alcohol content—not that she was one for chugging. When she was done, she let out a satisfied sigh and returned the glass to the sink.

She was on her way back to her room when she heard a faint thrumming from the chamber next to her and rolled her eyes. Drakken was known for keeping odd hours, but this was ridiculous.

'_Better make sure he doesn't blow us all up_,' she decided, steering herself into the next room.'_I'd at least like to be awake if that happens._' What she saw when she arrived was almost as annoying.

She had seen the device Drakken was using before, back when he and Kimmie's buffoon had switched energies. It was about two feet across and purple, with a metal plate sitting in the center while a couple of coils that more closely resembled crazy straws than anything science-related poked up from either side. She raised an eyebrow as she came up behind him.

"Uh, Dr. D, I totally get your devotion to the whole world domination thing, but don't you think you should give it a rest for one night?"

Drakken scowled, but not at her. "That's what I was trying to do, Shego, but events have forced my hand," he declared dramatically. "I cannot rest until I finish this!"

"Riiiiight," she replied, crossing her arms and waiting for the inevitable rant. "Please tell me this isn't another late night Coco Moo run."

"Not in the least," he insisted defensively, gesturing to a small beaker that lay on top of the metal plate that rested in the middle of the contraption, as well as the small insect inside. "I was kept from slumber by this creature and its compatriots, so I've decided to take matters into my own hands. All I need to do is discover the resonant frequency of this cricket, and then I'll be able to apply its effects across the entire lair, eliminating our pest problem for good!"

Shego had several questions for him, but one stuck out more than the others. "What the hell is 'resonant frequency?'"

"Well, if you want a simple explanation, it's when sound waves travelling at a certain frequency make an object vibrate with enough energy to cause it to rupture," he explained.

"You mean like when an opera singer shatters a wine glass?" she translated.

"If you want to get technical, yes."

"I think you got those backwards, Doc," she pointed out.

"Gnn, whatever!" he shouted. "My _point_ is, by doing this I can cause every cricket in the lair to explode, thus solving our problem."

"And how's that workin' out so far?"

"Well, science is mostly a process of trial and error, so I haven't had much luck as of yet," he answered, turning the dial again. "But if these things have their way I won't be sleeping tonight anyway."

Shego sighed in disgust. "Do you solve _every_ problem with supervillainy?"

He looked utterly perplexed that she would ask that. "Well I _am_ a supervillain, Shego," he replied, laying one hand over his chest. "It comes with the territory."

"I get that, but seriously, what's wrong with just squashing the cricket?"

"The fact that there are a million more of those insects just crawling around," he explained. "If I can deal with them all at once, then I'll never lose an hour of sleep again!" He raised his arms in the air triumphantly.

"Yeah, _or_ you could just wear these," she deadpanned, reaching into a pocket of her robe and pulling out a pair of small, foamy earplugs, which she had taken to wearing after incidents like this kept waking her up.

He looked at them in bewilderment. "What are those?"

"Earplugs," she explained in perfect deadpan. "They go in your ears. So you don't hear anything."

The mad scientist frowned like a petulant child as he considered that. "I still like my idea better."

"Yeah, well, good luck with that," she replied, tossing the earplugs over her shoulder as she turned to leave. "Just be quiet about it. Some of us are tryin' to sleep."

Drakken frowned as he watched her go, but picked up the earplugs regardless. Shego smirked as she headed back down the hallway to her room.

* * *

Not fifteen minutes later, Shego had settled into bed. Drakken, she knew, was fast asleep with his teddy bear and his milk, curled up tightly in his bed without a care in the world—she'd checked. For a notorious supervillain, he was such a child. That was what made working for him so consistently entertaining. It wasn't that she particularly _enjoyed_ mothering him—she'd gotten enough of that with her brothers—but he never ceased to amuse her, and that made him worth keeping in her book.

Shaking her head and smiling, Shego melted deeper into the covers, ready to cast off to dreamland.

_Chirp_

Ah, crap.

Dr. D. hadn't been lying about the crickets. Now they were in her room, and he had the only pair of earplugs. Shego grit her teeth, but stayed silent. If she could handle Kim Possible, she could put up with this.

_Chirp_.

Or not. She sat up with her power at full glow, and a furious growl erupted from deep within her.

"GODDAMMIT!"


End file.
